Written by Joe Janes
9/17/09
242 of 365
CAST:
Bill, 60s
Rachel, 30s
(In the dark we see sirens flashing and hear a siren coming to a stop. Lights up on Bill behind the wheel of a car. He looks exhilarated, much like a Nick Nolte mug shot. Rachel, a highway patrol woman walks up.)
RACHEL
Do you know how fast you were going?
BILL
185! Whoo!
RACHEL
Actually, I clocked you going 85 in a 65-mile per hour zone.
BILL
Better learn to read that radar gun of yours. I was driving like a bat out of hades. I slowed down to 85 to pull over.
RACHEL
Have you been drinking?
BILL
Wrong, again. Give you another guess.
RACHEL
Marijuana?
BILL
Amateur! I’ll give you a hint. (He recites the alphabet as quickly as possible. Rachel looks confused. He does it again. She’s still not getting it. Bill slows down.) A-B-C-O-C-A-I-
RACHEL
That’s not right.
BILL
-N-E.
RACHEL
Cocaine! You’re on cocaine!
BILL
Ding-ding-ding! Coked out of my mind.
RACHEL
I should arrest you!
BILL (getting out of the car)
Now you’re talking.
RACHEL
This will help my monthly quota. (Bill holds him arms out in front of himself. Rachel runs into his arms and hugs him.) Thanks, Dad.
BILL
Anything for my little girl.
(Blackout)
