Week Seven, Day Forty-Eight - “Health Nut"

“Health Nut”
Written by Joe Janes
3/7/09
48 of 365

CAST:
Bill, 40s
Ray, 40s
Counter Girl, 16

(Lights up on Bill and Ray standing in line at a fast food restaurant.)

RAY

Must be hard being a vegetarian.

BILL

No, not really. Even places like this have vegetarian options.

COUNTER GIRL

Welcome to Burger World. What would you like today?

BILL

I’ll have the Veggie Burger with Cheddar-like Cheese and Fake-n and a Vanilla Soy Shake.

COUNTER GIRL

Would you like baked fries or organic carrot sticks with that?

BILL

Ooh, organic carrot sticks.

COUNTER GIRL

That will be $13.75.

BILL

Okay, just a sec –

(Bill starts fishing through his wallet.)

COUNTER GIRL

Can I take your order?

RAY

Sure. I’ll have the gallon bucket of crispy veal nuggets with dippin’ sauce, a jumbo order of curly spicy fries, chocolate shake – make it a small - and a hot fried apple pie dessert treat.

COUNTER GIRL

That’ll be 4.99.

BILL

Can I change my order?

COUNTER GIRL

What would you like?

BILL

Something dead, fried, maybe throw some butter on it.

COUNTER GIRL

4.99.

(Blackout.)