Week 42, Day 291 - "Excursion Into Philosophy"

“Excursion Into Philosophy”

Written by Joe Janes

11/05/09

291 of 365

CAST:

Ernst, 40s

Marla, 20s

(Lights up on Ernst sitting on the edge of a twin bed. He is fully dressed and an open book sits next to him. Behind him, with her back turned, lies Marla asleep in a slip. Ernst looks deep in thought, but hard to read emotionally. He gets up and looks in a downstage mirror, unseen by the audience. He regards his face with concern. He sits back down and picks up the book. He struggles to read it without glasses.)

ERNST

The first and greatest victory is to conquer yourself; to be conquered by yourself is of all things most shameful and vile.

(Marla stretches and her hand falls on Ernst’s arm. Puzzled, she looks around the room. She takes her hand off his arm and scoots down to the end of the bed and gets up. She finds her blue uniform slacks and slips them on.)

MARLA

I don’t do this.

ERNST

Really? You’re very good at it.

MARLA

That’s not funny.

(She slips on her matching blue uniform jacket, but does not button it up. She sits on the bed.)

MARLA

What time is it?

ERNST (looking at his watch)

Six am.

MARLA

It’s so bright out.

ERNST

Yes.

MARLA

I can’t go out like this. I look ridiculous.

ERNST

It’s New York. You could walk down Broadway naked with a feather sticking out of your rump and no one would notice.

MARLA

Really.

ERNST

Well, I’d notice.

MARLA

You look cleaned up.

ERNST

I didn’t sleep.

MARLA

It’s not fair.

ERNST

Don’t leave. Go back to bed. We have the room till noon.

(She finds her shoes and puts them on.)

MARLA

I can’t do that. You’re a stranger.

ERNST

We’re still strangers?

MARLA

You know what I mean.

(She looks in the mirror and pulls her hair back. He stands behind her.)

ERNST

Do you see what you want to see when you look in the mirror?

MARLA

I don’t know. It’s just me. I don’t like my nose. (She looks at him and touches his cheek.) What about you?

ERNST

I don’t like what I see at all. I always expect to see a younger man looking back at me. And every time, it’s this man who keeps looking older and older. More gray. Baggier eyes. (He looks in the mirror.) I don’t know that guy.

MARLA

You look good for your age.

ERNST

Thanks and ouch.

(He sits back down and she moves to the door to leave.)

MARLA

I’m sorry about your wife.

(He looks at her blankly, at first, and then we see a sadness emerge. He looks away. She sits back down on the bed. She takes his hand and they sit in silence for a moment.)

ERNST

You know, you’re not so much a stranger to me. (She looks at him.) I saw you eating lunch yesterday. I was sitting on the other side of the café. I watch people and I saw you nibbling at your tuna salad sandwich like a bunny.

MARLA

I do not.

ERNST

Yes. You do. (He imitates her eating.) It was adorable. The café was crowded. You were alone.

MARLA

So many people in this city and I don’t know anyone.

ERNST

Then I saw you again in the afternoon at the drug store buying toothpaste and “Movie Mirror” magazine. Reading that magazine later in the park. And then I saw you on your way to work. Struck up a conversation about Jimmy Stewart on your way home.

(She gets up and moves towards the door.)

MARLA

I need to go.

ERNST

It’s not as bad as it sounds. You just fell victim to a lonely actor with a day off.

MARLA

That’s how you spend your free time? Hunting conquests?

(Ernst is silent. Marla opens the door.)

ERNST

Don’t forget your book.

MARLA

It’s not my book.

ERNST

It’s not mine.

(She closes the door, returns to the bed and picks up the book.)

MARLA

The Gideons must be expanding their library. (She reads from it.) How can you prove whether at this moment we are sleeping, and all our thoughts are a dream; or whether we are awake, and talking to one another in the waking state? (She puts the book down.) I can’t go out like this.

ERNST

Don’t.

(They stare at one another as lights fade.)