Written by Joe Janes
2/5/09
18 of 365
CAST:
Kimberly, late 20s
Wendy, 30
(Lights up on Kimberly and Wendy sitting at their respective desks. Kimberly is downstage right and Wendy is up left angled slightly away from Kimberly. There’s a small “ding” sound. Kimberly just received an e-mail.)
KIMBERLY (without turning her head)
WENDY
What? Hunh?KIMBERLY
You just sent me an e-mail, Wendy. WENDY (looking at screen)
Um, oh, yeah. What do you know? I guess I did. KIMBERLY
I’m ten feet away from you.WENDY
I know. I wasn’t thinking. Did you read it?KIMBERLY (reads the e-mail, rolls her eyes)
Wendy, nobody does Friendster any more.WENDY (rolls over to Kimberly in her office chair)
What’s that, Kimberly?KIMBERLY
Nobody does Friendster anymore. People do Facebook.WENDY
Facebook? Gotcha. You’re on Facebook?KIMBERLY
No. I’m not. And I’m not on Friendster.WENDY
Gotcha. (She rolls back to her desk. Kimberly sighs. Wendy rolls back.) Hmmm?KIMBERLY
What?WENDY
Did you say something to me?KIMBERLY
No.WENDY
Okay. (She rolls back and starts working at her computer. Kimberly resumes work and there’s another “ding.” She rolls her eyes. Wendy keeps working but also keeps looking over at Kimberly. Suddenly, there’s a “ding ding” at Kimberly’s computer.)KIMBERLY
Why are you instant messaging me? I’m right here?WENDY
Um, oh. Okay. Sorry. You looked busy. I didn’t want to disturb you. Did you get my evite?KIMBERLY (checking)
Yes. I got your evite. WENDY (rolls over to Kimberly)
Yeah? Does it sound like fun? Do you like bowling?KIMBERLY
No. Not really.WENDY
That’s cool. We can do something else.KIMBERLY
Why would you want to do something else? It’s your (reading screen) Birthday Bowling Bash.WENDY
I want everyone to have a good time. Not everyone likes bowling. What would you like to do, Kimberly?KIMBERLY
Wendy. Here’s the thing. I have my job and I have my life outside my job. I like to keep them separate. Do you understand?WENDY
Sure. Gotcha. (She rolls back, sadly. She sits at her computer, listlessly typing. She sniffs a bit. Kimberly, feeling the guilt, walks over to her.)KIMBERLY
It’s nothing personal, Wendy. Did you get any other responses from your evite?WENDY
I only sent it to you.KIMBERLY
You sent an evite to your Birthday Bowling Bash only to me? WENDY
My 30th Birthday Bowling Bash.KIMBERLY
Your 30th? Why would you do that?WENDY
You’ll just laugh at me.KIMBERLY
I promise I won’t laugh.WENDY
I think you’re cool.KIMBERLY
You think I’m cool? Wendy, this isn’t high school. It’s work.WENDY
I know. I know. It’s stupid. I still think you’re cool. And I wanted to hang out with you on my birthday.KIMBERLY
Wendy, I already hang out with you more than any other human being on the planet.WENDY
You do?KIMBERLY
We hang out eight hours a day five days a week. WENDY
You do! Except when you go to lunch. Or on unscheduled breaks, KIMBERLY
Happy birthday. Really. Happy birthday. I just like to keep my life in different compartments, Wendy. I have my co-workers; I have my family and friends. I like to leave my work at work. If I have a friend who is also a co-worker, you know what we’ll do when we get together? WENDY (excited by the idea)
No, what will we do?KIMBERLY
We’ll talk about work. WENDY
Yeah. That Mr. O’Connell. Ooh, he makes me mad sometimes. He’s so high strung. Why doesn’t he just die of a heart attack, already?KIMBERLY (cutting her off)
Wendy, Wendy! I don’t want to talk about work when I’m not at work. Do you understand? Work at work. WENDY
Sure. I understand. I’m the same way, really. I have work and I have my “not” work. Work stays here. Birds, Scrabble, decorating my jeans jackets with rhinestones and metal studs, washing my mother’s hair, all stays at home.KIMBERLY
Good. What are you doing for your birthday?WENDY
I just told you.KIMBERLY
You’re washing your mother’s hair on your birthday?WENDY
After we play Scrabble and decorate our matching jean jackets.(Awkward hopeful pause)
KIMBERLY
Sounds like a good time.WENDY
Do you want-?(Kimberly stops her with a look and a raised index finger. Wendy sheepishly smiles and nods and mime “locks” her lips as she returns to work. Kimberly goes back to her desk and back to work. There’s a “ding.”)
KIMBERLY
I told you I’m not on Facebook!(Lights Out)
