Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Week 30, Day 206 - “An Operator Tries To Help Jim Croce Make A Call”

“An Operator Tries To Help Jim Croce Make A Call”
Written by Joe Janes
8/12/09
206 of 365

CAST
Charlie, 30s

(Lights up on Charlie, a casually dressed telephone operator wearing a headset and sitting before a computer terminal.)

CHARLIE (Into headset)
Sorry, Mr. Floyd. We keep getting disconnected from Mrs. Floyd. I think she’s hanging up- Hello? …Mr. Floyd? …Hello? (He shrugs and disconnects the call and pushes another button.) Information, Charlie speaking, city and state, please?...Los Angeles, California… (He types in the info)…Okay, how may I help you?......Sir, you having a number on a matchbook that’s old and faded - not very helpful… Is it a business or a residence?... Do you have an address or a name?...Raye? R-A-Y-E…No “e.” …Oh. …Do you have a last name?... No. I see. We’re talking Los Angeles here, Sir. I really want to help you, but there are millions of people in LA. Many of them, I’m sure, go by the name Ray. …Was Ray a celebrity? That might help narrow it down. Was it Ray Parker, Jr? Ray Romano?... Well, who is this guy?... ………Sir, if he’s your best old ex-friend and you don’t know his last name, then I can understand why he’s an ex-friend………You should know your friends well enough to know their last name. Just saying… …………Oh, it’s not him you want to talk to. …It’s your ex-girlfriend. …(Sucks air through is teeth) …Yah, that sucks. I feel really bad for you. What a dick. Are you sure it wasn’t Ray Romano?… Maybe the phone is listed under the lady’s name, what is it?...Her name, what is it?...There’s something in your eye? ………………………I’ll wait…………………Just take a deep breath, Sir…………………………I’m sure they’ll be happy to know you’re fine, but, to be honest, you don’t sound fine. ……Did you have some kind of head injury or something?... Look, I’m sorry, but I really can’t help you without more specific information. …………………Thanks for saying that……………………Sir, even if I could keep the dime, you hang on to it. I think you need it more than I do. Bye, now. (He hangs up) Put it towards some therapy or something…(Picks up a new call) Information, Charlie speaking- What? Oh. Thank God. Yes, I have that number, right here. Jenny, Jenny. 867-5309. Would you like me to connect you?

(Blackout)

In case you weren't aware of the song or would like to hear it, here's a cover of it by Strat2Caster...