Written by Joe Janes
1/4/10
351 of 365
Cast:
Princess Peanut, 20s
Felicia, 20s
Freddie, 20s
Fergie, 20s
Fernando, 20s
(Lights up on flowers Felicia, Freddie and Fergie enjoying the sun coming up on their faces. Princess Peanut enters with a watering can and large sheers.)
PRINCESS
Good morning, flowers!
FLOWERS ALL
Good morning, Princess Peanut!
PRINCESS
What a lovely day it is today.
FELICIA
It truly is a lovely day. The sun is on my face and I feel so alive.
PRINCESS
And you look so pretty, Felicia.
FELICIA
Thank you, Princess Peanut.
FREDDIE
I, too, appreciate this lovely day. And everyone smells so delightful. Even me!
PRINCESS
Yes, you do, Freddie. You smell so fresh and pretty.
FREDDIE
Thank you, Princess Peanut.
(Fergie sighs a big sigh.)
PRINCESS
What’s the matter, Fergie? You’re the tallest and prettiest flower of them all.
FERGIE
Thank you, Princess Peanut. I was just thinking.
PRINCESS
About what, Fergie?
FERGIE
Oh, nothing.
PRINCESS
I think we’d all like to know, wouldn’t we?
(All the Felicia and Freddie chime in with “yeses” and “sures.”)
FERGIE
I miss Fernando.
FELICIA
We all miss Fernando.
FREDDIE
I admire Fernando. One day, he is standing right next to me, the next day, he is riding in your loverly buttercup hair, Princess.
PRINCESS
Fernando is in a happy place, now.
FELICIA
The garden on the castle’s roof?
PRINCESS
Yes. Exactly. He is there with all the other flowers that have come from this garden. You should be happy for Fernando, Fergie.
FERGIE
I guess. We’re flowers, right?
FELICIA
The prettiest flowers in the land!
FREDDIE
None prettier.
PRINCESS
I have to agree with Felicia and Freddie.
FERGIE
And what does one do with flowers?
PRINCESS
Well, Fergie. I water you and take care of you. And I admire how pretty you all are. And then I move you to a better place.
(All the flowers except Fergie cheer.)
FERGIE
Sure, sure. But then what?
PRINCESS
I’m not sure what you mean.
(Fernando, the stub of a flower rises from the dirt.)
FERNANDO
I know what petal face means.
FELICIA
It’s a monster!
FERNANDO
I am no monster.
PRINCESS
Must be a pesky weed. I’ll just pull it-
FERNANDO
I am no weed. I am one of you.
FERGIE
Fernando!
FREDDIE
Impossible. It can’t be. Is it? Fernando?
FERNANDO
I am what is left of Fernando. Princess Peanut picked the flower, but left the roots. And I know. I know what happens to the flowers, Princess Peanut.
PRIINCESS
Well, then, perhaps you should explain it to the rest of us, Fernando. If that’s really who you are. Although the Fernando I knew was handsome.
FERNANDO (to the flowers)
You’re new. You’re young. You’re pretty. I was pretty.
FERGIE
It’s not going to be like this forever, is it?
PRINCESS
What makes you think of such things?
FELICIA
I don’t. I don’t think about anything, Princess Peanut.
PRINCESS
Good for you, Felicia.
FREDDIE
I didn’t think about it until now. What exactly do you plan to do with us, Princess?
FERNANDO
Tell them the truth.
PRINCESS
Well, I was going to gather you all up and bring you inside to enjoy sitting in a vase on my dinner table.
FELICIA
You’re going to eat us?
PRINCESS
No, no, Felicia. I won’t eat you. I just think you’ll look pretty there.
FELICIA
I think I look pretty here.
PRINCESS
The truth is, Fernando and Fergie are right. This doesn’t last forever. Sooner or later, I have to pick you. If I don’t, you’ll just die where you are. (Looking at Fernando) Eventually.
FREDDIE
If you pick us, we don’t die?
FERNANDO
You die that way, too.
PRINCESS
Just with more dignity.
FERNANDO
Until you start to droop and get throw you out with the trash.
PRINCESS
But you’ll be dead and very unaware by that time.
FERNANDO
Fernando was not unaware. We were connected. I could feel his silent screams as his stem and flowers dried up and turned to rot.
FELICIA
I don’t want to die that way.
FERNANDO
We don’t have to. Aha! (He holds up the pair of large sheers Princess Peanut left on the ground.) We can cut our selves loose and run for freedom. (He cuts himself free and passes the sheers along.)
PRINCESS
No. You can’t leave. I have guests coming over for dinner tonight. I won’t let you leave.
FERGIE
You don’t want to get in our way.
FREDDIE
Get her!
(The all rush toward her and fall to the ground.)
FERNANDO
That was a bad idea.
(Blackout.)
