Written by Joe Janes
47 of 365
(Lights up on Joey walking in to his small apartment. He looks beat. He takes off his backpack and walks over to the kitchen. He looks on the counter. He looks in the fridge. He looks pissed.)
JOEYBrennan! Brennan! (He walks over to Brennan’s door and knocks on it.) Brennan!
(Brennan opens the door. Brennan is eating a banana.)
JOEY (continuing)We need to talk.
(Brennan walks out and sits on the sofa.)
BRENNANWell? What’s eating you?
JOEYI work all day at the Apple Store. I come home. I’m tired. All I want to do is peel off my backpack and eat a banana.
JOEY“Oh’s” right. No banana.
(A bear sticks his head out of Brennan’s door.)
BRENNANMy bad, Joey. I didn’t know that was your banana.
JOEYWe’re the only two people who live here. Whose banana would it be?
(The bear walks over to the refrigerator and opens the door.)
BRENNANHey, you know. You buy food. I buy food. It gets confusing. You should write your name on it.
(The bear pulls a beer can out of the fridge. Brennan looks at the banana peel and sees Joey’s name written on it. The bear pops open the beer can.)
BRENNANSorry, man. My bad. I owe you one banana.
JOEYYou owe me more than that. You never buy food. You always eat mine.
(The bear takes a seat in a living room chair and continues to watch them argue.)
BRENNANHey, we’re buddies. This is what buddies do. Share food.
JOEYWe’re not buddies. We’re barely roommates. We’re strangers.
BRENNANYour words cut me like a knife.
JOEYI’m serious, Brennan. All you do is hole up in your cave of a room. The only time I see you is when you come out to forage for food or take a shit. And you don’t talk, you just grunt.
BRENNANYou want to talk?
JOEYYeah. Yeah, I do. That’s what buddies would do.
BRENNANThen let’s talk. Buddy.
(Joey sits. There is a long, awkward pause as the bear sips his beer.)
BRENNAN (continuing)You want to watch TV?
JOEYThat’s not talking.
JOEY (continuing)What did you do today?
JOEYHow was work?
BRENNANI work at The Gap. It sucked. I don’t want to talk about it.
JOEYFine, Let’s see how it makes you feel. I’m going to get some food – (Joey goes through the cupboards in the kitchen and opens the fridge.) Is there anything you did not eat? I’m going to take this beer and this half bag of frozen okra and go to my room and not talk to you the rest of the night, Buddy!
(Joey exits to his room. The bear stands and looks at Brennan. Brennan gives the bear a “what the fuck do you want” look. The bear shakes his head in disappointment. The bear exits to Joey’s room. Lights fade.)