Written by Joe Janes
84 of 365
(Lights up on a waiter picking up the check from the table of a customer. The waiter notices a small business-like card with the money.)
CUSTOMERThat explains why I am not tipping you.
WAITERDid you have a problem with the service?
CUSTOMERI am not tipping you, as the card explains, because I do not believe in tipping. I believe in paying the price on the menu for my food. If the restaurant wants you to get part of it, they should charge me more and give you a higher wage.
WAITERTipping is the way the restaurant keeps cost down and I make a living.
CUSTOMERI do not believe in it.
WAITERYeah, well, I don’t believe in assholes, but guess what?