Written by Joe Janes
263 of 365
(Lights up in the Helen and Carl’s kitchen. Helen is cooking at the stove, making burgers. Carl is getting a beer out of the fridge. Sharod walks through with his backpack on.)
Hi, Mom, Hi, Dad. I’m going to Cindy’s for vegan tacos.
Wait a minute, Sharod. Try this. It’s a veggie burger.
You made a veggie burger.
I found the recipe on the PETA website. Try it.
Really? You were on the PETA website?
Mom’s a lot hipper than you think. Give it a try.
(Sharod takes the burger. Sniffs it and takes a small bite out of it.)
Mom. That’s amazing. That’s a really good veggie burger. Thanks. I’ll go call Cindy and see if she can come over here.
I’ll make more.
(Carl takes a burger and tries it.)
Tastes just like a burger. What’s makes it taste so much like meat?
Meat. It’s 100% pure beef.
Helen, that doesn’t seem right.
Oh, he’ll never know. Meat’s good for you and a boy needs protein. How will he ever know?
(Offstage we hear violent vomiting.)
CARL (grabbing another burger)
I think he just found out.