During the '90's, Saturday morning cartoons were edged off the networks and replaced by morning news. For a short time, they made their home on Sunday mornings. The WB had my favorite line-up. You could watch Superman/Batman Adventures, Batman Beyond and Men in Black: The Series. All top quality animation and a fine alternative to going to church. Where the others live on in syndication and on DVD, with ocassional new material going to DVD, Men in Black seems to have disappeared.
Based on the first MIB film and borrowing from the original comic book, the series continued the adventures of J, K and agent Elle. And it did it well. Stories were smart and funny and often took unexpected twists. Where the film series went off the rails with over-the-top special effects and a weak story in their sequel, the animated series was very consistent. Barry Sonnenfeld could have kept the film series going if he had taken a few cues from these guys.
"The Big Bad Bug Syndrome" is a continuation of the film storyline. As far as I can tell, all the MIB film actors stayed away from the animated version, except for Vincent D'Onofrio who voices "Edwin" in this.The Queen of the Bugs puts out a bounty on the MIB agent responsible for the demise of dearly-departed Edgar. Now Elle must escape from some nasty Bugs - including Edgar's brother, Edwin - looking to collect the reward.
Back and ready for action. New place, new time. Saturdays at Gorilla Tango, 1919 North Milwaukee (near Western) from 1pm to 3pm. $5. Bring in scenes. Have them read.
ONE MESSAGE. LOUD AND CLEAR
Tuesday, March 4th - get your voice heard by creating a worldwide Cyber Shout. Post on your blog, where ever you can, "Impeach Bush Now!"
Disappointed, America. I am very disappointed. What's happened to you? Are we changing the criteria for which we evaluate our presidential candidates?
Historically speaking, we have always voted for the fella with the best hair. I am puzzled (and still very much disappointed) at Mitt Romney and John Edwards dropping out of the race. The two candidates with the best headlocks possibly ever. Edwards was criticized for getting $400 haircuts, but dammit, you can't deny that you didn't see every dollar right there on his scalp.
It was no surprise when Rudy Giulliani - whose name I won't even look up to see if I am spelling right - dropped out. He never should have dropped his comb over look from his pre-9/11 days. It was working for him. It was keeping the terrorists at bay. Terrorists respect hair coverage. That's why they wear turbans and such. To cover their bald shame. And speaking of 9/11, did Rudy really think evoking the tragedy of 9/11 would make us stop thinking about the tragedy of his chrome trailer hitch head? What was he thinking? The only president with less hair was Ford, and guess what, he wasn't elected! And he lost to Carter, one of the best collections of follicles ever in the White House.
I know, I know...what about Eisenhower, Mr. Smarty-Pants? Eisenhower was a general first and, thanks mostly to George S. Patton, we expect and prefer our generals to be bald.
Think about it. The only advantage George W. Bush had over John Kerry and Al Gore is that he had, and has, better hair. Clinton's sassy salt-and-pepper look certainly was no match for Bush, Sr's walking Brylcream ad. Bush, Sr was up against Dukakis, who suffered from a similar hair condition as Kerry known as "hair helmet." Too much of a good thing.
Nixon won running against McGovern and Hubert Humphrey - both bald guys and one of them named Hubert!
But what about Reagan, you ask? I'll tell you about Reagan, Sir! He was older than God and his hair was all slick and raveny.
By now, it has probably crossed your mind that "Hey, Joe. Don't you have male pattern baldness?" If the pattern of which you speak is "gone," than yes. I am. Which makes me all the more qualified to speak and it is the number one factor that keeps me from running for office myself. Number one! Money is second. Third is that overly documented, well publicized week I spent doing blow and bonking hookers and farm animals in Tiajuana.
But with Edwards and Romney gone, how are we supposed to judge our candidates? Look at McCain, Huckabee, Obama and Clinton. Nothing special going on there. Maybe they'll bring hats back in fashion. I'd like to vote for the candidate with the spiffiest chapeau.
Romney and Edwards aren't fools, though. They are clearly positioning themselves for vice-president positions. When Americans come to their senses and stop judging their candidates on issues and character, they'll be back in 2012 with their hair stylists in tow.
ONE MESSAGE. LOUD AND CLEAR.
On Tuesday, March 4th bloggers and fans of bloggers around the world are invited to do a Cyber Shout - "Impeach Bush Now!" Post it wherever you can. Still not sure if you should hop on this bandwagon? There's actually an "Impeach Bush" website. And it's a "dot.org"! Check it out and then make some noise with us.
ROBOWRITERS TOMORROW
Back and ready for action. New place, new time. Gorilla Tango, 1919 North Milwaukee (near Western) from 1pm to 3pm. $5. Bring in scenes. Have them read. Do a little dance. Make a little love.
THE BS NEWS QUIZ OF THE DAY
Yesterday, I asked...
"Which celebrity does Arizona Sheriff Joe Arpaio want to recruit to help go after illegal aliens?"
28% said "Sylvester Stallone" - How do you go after criminals who don't speak English? Send in someone who barely speaks it himself.
14% said "Clint Eastwood" - Clint Eastwood may be old, but he's tough. I'm sure he can kick my ass. Hell, Clint Howard could kick my ass. But I think Clint Eastwood is too busy being, well, Clint Eastwood.
15% said "Sigourney Weaver" - She only goes after illegal aliens that like to implant eggs in people's stomachs.
43% got it right with "Shaquille O'Neal"
According to The National Ledger, the Phoenix Suns have a new center in Shaquille O'Neal. Now the world famous "America's toughest sheriff" Joe Arpaio of Maricopa County Arizona wants to put Shaq to work when he is not running up and down the court from the Suns. The sheriff added, ``I'm glad he's coming out to my turf. I'm hoping we'll recruit him for our posse. Maybe we'll go after illegal immigrants and other crime." Posse? Who is this guy? Is he going after illegal aliens or injuns?
It snowed like crazy yesterday. Walking to Columbia from the "L" in the morning was like walking into a snow blower. Except instead of blowing snow, it was blowing stinging crushed ice. By lunchtime, the ice pellets turned to big fluffy flakes and it looked like Chicago was in a snow globe set to vibrate. Columbia canceled their evening classes. Julie's work shortened their day and sent people home. Looked like it was going to be a snow day. Everyone was closing up shop, except for Second City.
I cut my Columbia classes early and headed home where I could watch the tundra forming outside from the comfort of my sofa. I had a seven o'clock class at Second City that I was sure would be canceled. Many of our students drive in from the suburbs. It's just too risky to hold classes. I kept checking the website and the outgoing message of the training center. Classes were NOT canceled, both reassured. This made me bitchy. I did not want to schlep back outside and make my cold, slushy way to Second City via a bus and an "L" just to have two or three students show up.
In Detroit, I was in charge of the Second City training center there. While at ComedySportz-Chicago, I was in charge of the training center here. The last thing I ever wanted to do was cancel classes. Aside from screwing with the momentum of a class, it fucks up the schedule. A year-long schedule can be packed tight with little margin for rescheduling. It's a headache. One part of me understood why Second City wasn't canceling classes. But the people not canceling the classes are not the people who have to teach them. And if only half the class or less shows up, you may as well have canceled it, because you'll have to go over the material again later. So, another part of me was very bitter and resentful about having to leave my sofa.
Second City has apparently made a deal with God, the devil or some Norse diety that controls the weather. The snow stopped shortly after 6pm and it all cleared up. Out of thirteen students, I had nine. Nine very dependable students who are really digging into their work. It was fun and inspiring. I'm glad I went. I'm glad those assholes didn't cancel classes.
ONE MESSAGE. LOUD AND CLEAR.
On Tuesday, March 4th bloggers and fans of bloggers around the world are invited to do a Cyber Shout - "Impeach Bush Now!" Post it wherever you can. Still not sure if you should hop on this bandwagon? For Democracy has already written up articles of impeachment. Check it out and then make some noise with us, won't you?
THE BS NEWS QUIZ OF THE DAY
Yesterday, I asked...
"Police in St. Augustine, Fla arrested a woman who had an unrestrained toddler in her back seat and seat belted in her front passenger seat was what?"
66% said "A dog" - Even though Fido does love to ride shot gun, no.
16% said "A birthday cake" - No, but I have seat belted a cake before. The toddler can fend for himself. That cake was expensive.
Nobody said "A blow-up doll" -They only need to be seat belted when filled with helium.
18% nailed it with "A 24-pack of beer"
According to the AP , police arrested a motorist they say had a 24-pack of beer strapped in with a seat belt but had a 16-month-old girl unrestrained in the back seat with the toddler's mother. Tina D. Williams was pulled over in St. Augustine on Sunday for allegedly running a red light. A 24-pack of Busch beer was strapped in with the passenger-side seat belt, according to an arrest report. Williams was charged with driving under the influence, child abuse, possession of drug paraphernalia and driving without a license. Normally, I wouldn't have an issue with her choices here. But I do question the need to be so careful with Busch beer. Guinness I could understand. Busch beer? May as well drink carbonated formaldehyde.
Hillary Clinton's campaign is really paving the way for a woman to take the White House. That's really a great thing and about 100 years overdue.
Barack Obama is doing the same thing for blacks, and people with silly sounding names, by going farther than any of his predecessors were able to go.
The question to ask yourself if you are a democrat, or leaning that way, is...
Do you really want this presidential lineage?
BUSH - CLINTON - CLINTON - BUSH - BUSH - CLINTON
Does that really represent a change in Washington?
Whereas...
BUSH - CLINTON - CLINTON - BUSH - BUSH - OBAMA
Looks like a change to me. More syllables, more vowels, more fun to say.
For republicans, I don't think McCain, Romney or Huckabee offer much that's different than what we've been putting up with the last seven years. Although, I do love the name Huckabee (it's believed to mean "crooked river."). Although "President Huckabee" sounds like a character on a kids show. "Oh, no! Our kitten is missing! Whatever will we do? I know, let's go see President Huckabee! He'll help us. Yay!"
But, mainly, I think Barack is just plain the most inspiring candidate out there. Smart. Eloquent. Charming. Authentic. I watched his speech last night. He actually made me feel like I mattered. That I was important and had a say in the direction America is going and in the quality of my life and country. That's pretty good, because I am one cynical motherfucker.
ONE MESSAGE. LOUD AND CLEAR.
On Tuesday, March 4th bloggers and fans of bloggers around the world are invited to do a Cyber Shout - "Impeach Bush Now!" Post it wherever you can. Still not sure if you should hop on this bandwagon? Here's 935 reasons you might consider. Join us, won't you?
THE BS NEWS QUIZ OF THE DAY
Yesterday, I asked...
"The US Centers for Disease Control believes a recent outbreak of paralysis at a Minnesota meat processing plant is being caused by what?"
37% said "Chicken Butts" - Guess what? No.
23% said "Assorted Snouts" - Nope. Eat all you want.
No one said "Cow Stomachs" - But they thought "Chicken Butt" was viable.
40% got it right with "Pig Brains"
According to Medical News Today, the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention issued an update last week to its investigation of an outbreak of a paralysing condition that is affecting certain meat processing plant workers who use compressed air to remove the brains from the heads of pig carcases (anyone else have that on their resume?). The current thinking is that the meat workers are being exposed to splatter and aerosol droplets of pig brain tissue created by the compressed air blast, which liquefies the tissue before expelling it from the pig skull. Once inhaled, small particles of pig brain tissue are then attacked by the worker's immune system which uses antibodies that also attack the body's own almost identical human nerve tissue.
Almost identical human nerve tissue!?!
Maybe we weren't descended from apes.
Guess that makes this guy the missing link...
And judging from the background of the photo (courtesy of Cigar Afficianado), I guess pigs do fly. And smoke in non-smoking areas.
Being part-time faculty at Columbia College, there aren't too many perks. So, you have to grab them where you can. One thing that's encouraged is to take your classes to theater productions and events that happen during your class time. Sometimes that's cool, sometimes it's grueling and, sometimes, like yesterday, it's a pleasure.
I got to sit in the same room with Olympia Dukakis, Nora Dunn, Carmen Roman and Kate Buddeke. Carmen and Kate are established veteran actresses on the Chicago scene. Olympia is in town directing Carmen in a play called Botanic Garden at Victory Gardens and Nora is directing Kate in Augusta at the American Theater Company. Albert Williams, arts editor of The Reader, organized the event. He noticed that two prominent ladies were in town directing two shows close to opening and rightly thought it would be a great idea to get them in a room together to see what they had to say. And he was right.
The most surprising thing they had to say was about the current state of theater across the country and how the actor has been reduced to just a prop. There's very little collaboration between actors and a few of them were even in shows where they were told not to talk to the director. Obviously, this is true about most film and television productions. They are huge machines with looming deadlines and expanding budgets. They need for you to come in with your lines down and to be able to hit your mark and deliver the goods. But in theater? I thought that was supposed to be different.
It's most prominent in New York on Broadway. Which does make sense. Most of the shows on Broadway are producer-driven and market-driven affairs. They are pre-produced to death and by the time the actor arrives for work, they really are reduced to "stand there and do this" type of direction. But they also found this at smaller theaters and at regional theaters across the country. That, I am sure, is a money thing. Theater companies have to figure out how to do the best job possible on the tightest budget. It's cost prohibitive to bring name actors in during the pre-production stage. Rehearsal periods are shortened to save bucks. Sets are built and dressed without the inclusion of an actor's input because that kind of luxury would take money. I'm not arguing against their point. I can just understand how it has become the way that it is.
The ladies were there to promote a culture where actors are allowed to do their jobs. Where they are allowed and encouraged to come in with thoughts and opinions about their characters and ideas about what works and what doesn't work about the story or the set.
Many directors would perceive this as trouble. No one wants to work with an actor who is difficult. As a writer and a director, I get concerned about an actor who wants to change the script. The script I'm already 100 percent happy with or I wouldn't be directing it. But most of the actors I have worked with are smart. Their ideas actually improve the story. As a writer, I also don't want an actor who wants to change everything, but I tend to know when something's not clicking and have had my butt saved on more than one occassion by an actor with a better idea.
I loved what Olympia, Nora, Kate and Carmen had to say. As a director, it's important to surround yourself with people - actors, designers and crew - who want to work together. Whose instincts you trust. Some artists will want to change things just to put their stamp on it. I think, to foster the culture the actresses want, it's up to the director to cast well. Or cast, period. Many directors don't get to cast their own shows.
Some tidbits from the discussion...
- Actors are collaborators in a show, not competitors. Olympia discussed a period in her development where she didn't care about the other actors. She was focused on having her moment on stage. The kind of moment that led to the next job. Her competitiveness worked career-wise, but she got to a point where she stopped caring about the work. As she put it, "If you're too busy trying to win, you forget to play."
- Take "Is this what you want?" out of your vocabulary. An actor's job isn't to be focused on giving the director what he or she wants, it's to serve the show.
- Take "That's not how I work" out of your vocabulary. It's limiting and isolating. Actors grow and change. How you work will change with it. Try new things. Experiment.
- As a director, you can be the top of the pyramid, which is the current model, or you can be the eye of a hurricane. The calm in the chaos and fury that pulls everything together.
Overall, I think Nora Dunn had the definitive statement on the whole process. "You're not there to please the audience, you're trying to engage them."
SUPER TUESDAY
Go vote. It's not just the presidential primaries on the ballot. But in regards to the presidential primary, if you're not sure who to vote for, READ THIS from Adam Felber.
ONE MESSAGE. LOUD AND CLEAR.
Sounds like the snowball is rolling on this. I have had people who are fans of this blog tell me they are going to do this and are spreading the word. Good job, everyone! On Tuesday, March 4th bloggers and fans of bloggers around the world are invited to do a Cyber Shout - "Impeach Bush Now!" Join us, won't you?
THE BS NEWS QUIZ OF THE DAY
Yesterday, I asked...
"Legislators in Mississippi are introducing a bill that would make it illegal for restaurants to serve whom?"
50% said "Illegal Aliens" - What? They can work there but not eat there?
10% said "Flag-wearing Confederates" - The south shall rise, again. For seconds from the buffet.
No one said "Suspected Terrorists"
40% got it right with "Obese People"
According to The Smoking Gun, Mississippi legislators introduced a bill that would make it illegal for state-licensed restaurants to serve obese patrons. The bill, which is likely dead on arrival, proposes that the state's Department of Health establish weight criteria after consultation with Mississippi's Council on Obesity. It does not detail what penalties an eatery would face if its grub was served to someone with an excessive body mass index. I recommend they be forced to feed the patron until this happens...
In 2002-03, playwright Suzan-Lori Parks wrote a "play" a day. In 2007, theater companies all across America produced them seven at a time throughout the year in what was labeled an International Theater Festival. I saw an evening produced here by Collaboraction. Don Hallsaw an evening produced at The Peter Jones Gallery. Another friend, known as Old Ned to the blog world, participated in an evening as an actor - sorry, I don't remember the company. The "plays" she wrote were all very short. Just a few lines of dialogue. What I do remember is that while the stunt was impressive, all the work I saw and have heard about was crap. Basically, it was much a doo-doo about nothing (sorry, couldn't resist). I think you can do better. I know you can.
The assignment for this week is to write a play a day for five days. A play, as defined by the Neo-Futurists, is anything having a beginning, a middle, and an end. Limit each play to one page. As you write new ones, take time to look at the previous ones and polish them up. Make them all distinct and stand on their own. If any of them demand more attention and need to expand, do it next week.
ONE MESSAGE. LOUD AND CLEAR
SOunds like the snowball is rolling on this. I have had people who are fans of this blog tell me they are going to do this and are spreading the word. Good job, everyone! On Tuesday, March 4th bloggers and fans of bloggers around the world are invited to do a Cyber Shout - "Impeach Bush Now!" Join us, won't you?
THE BS NEWS QUIZ OF THE DAY
On Friday, I asked...
"Sign language interpreters in Thailand are getting into trouble for referring to the new prime minister by doing what?"
33% said "Pointing at their behinds" - That's more a reference to how he gets to and from parliament. Old school. Rides a mule.
16% said "Rolling their eyes" - I'm sure that's more to emphasize what foresight and vision the man has.
No one fell for "Picking their ears"
51% got it right with "Holding their noses"
According to the AP, Thai sign language interpreters often indicate prominent facial features as shorthand for dignitaries, and during a live broadcast of last Monday's parliamentary session, they held their noses between two fingers numerous times to refer to Samak. Samak Sundaravej, chosen in parliament last week as the first elected prime minister since a Sept. 2006 coup, has been nicknamed "Mr. Rose Apple Nose" because many claim his nose resembles the fruit. One interpreter, Kanittha Rattanasin, said this gesture has long been used for Samak but is drawing wide notice only now. "It is not meant as a nose joke," she said. "We have touched our noses for years to refer to Samak but people noticed this time because we had to repeat the movement over 300 times."
Tomorrow is the Angry White Guy's birthday, so this rare vintage clip is for him. And I think he'll get a kick out of the audacity of the wildly inappropriate black stereotype. The maid sounds familiar. I think she's voiced by the same man - that's right, MAN - who played the maid on radio's Fibber McGee and Molly. The clip's a little beat up and faded, but still fun. Love the frog.
ROBOWRITERS STARTS TODAY!
Back and ready for action. New place, new time. Gorilla Tango, 1919 North Milwaukee (near Western) from 1pm to 3pm. $5. Bring in scenes. Have them read. Have some fun.
ONE MESSAGE. LOUD AND CLEAR
On Tuesday, March 4th bloggers and fans of bloggers around the world are invited to do a Cyber Shout - "Impeach Bush Now!" Join us, won't you?
