Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Somebody Likes Your Stuff

We started the rehearsal process last week for the WNEP Dada show which means my mind keeps slipping down back alleys and making up poems. Completely without my permission. Here's one. Not very Dada, but I thought it was fun.


Somebody Likes Your Stuff

You think you've got chubby thighs.


Believe me, there's somebody out there who wants to put ice-cream on those chubby thighs.


Freaking out about the freckles on your nose.


There's someone out there who sees nothing but constellations in them.


Moles are nothing but chocolate chips.


As we merrily march towards our inevitable deaths...
Cheer up.

No matter what you've got and no matter how you feel about it.


Somebody likes your stuff.


Sober, even.


THE BS NEWS QUIZ OF THE DAY

On Monday, I asked this question...
"A trucker in England is suing his employer for discrimination ever since they found out what about him?"
33% answered "His middle name is Obama." Nah, they don't care about that sort of ridiculous stuff. It's England, not America!

16% answered "He gives handicapped people rides." Nope. They have to use their own wheels. Or crutches. Or stumps.


50% answered "He can't reach the peddles." Actually, he can. Especially when he wears his CFM pumps.


If you haven't guessed, the correct answer, which nobody got, is "He wears dresses."

According to the UK newspaper
The Daily Mail, Mike was a well-respected top truck driver until he informed his bosses he was a transsexual, changed his name to Vikki-Marie and started wearing dresses to work. They started cancelling her regular shifts and co-workers who were once her friends started to taunt her. Vikki-Marie used to be a soldier, has been married twice and has a teenage daughter. And she really looks tough in a dress. A very difficult look to pull off. You go girl!


1 comment:

M. Brownlee said...

Love the poem.

Too bad Hallmark doesn't have a "reality of life" section. This would be a huge seller.