Thursday, March 12, 2009

Week Eight, Day 53 - “Dried and Cured Meats”

“Dried and Cured Meats”
Written by Joe Janes
3/12/09
53 of 365

CAST
Will, 50s
Darla, 30s
Nancy, 20
Clerk, old

(Lights up on Will sitting at a small table at a convenience store/gas station. Darla enters. They are both very professional looking. Upstage left is a clerk at a counter counting money from a register.)

WILL
Darla!

DARLA
Mr. Darnell.

WILL
Please, call me Will.

DARLA
Thanks, Will. Glad to get a second interview. This is an unusual place to meet.

WILL
Hey, when you’re on the go, you’re on the go. Want some coffee?

DARLA
Oh, no thank you.

(Will refills his cup at a coffee urn and loads his suit coat pockets with creamers.)

WILL
They also have individually wrapped Pop Tarts near the register, if you are so inclined.

DARLA
Really. I’m fine.

CLERK
Hey, refills ain’t free. One dollar.

WILL
No problem, no problem. Can you break a fifty?

CLERK
You know I can’t break a fifty.

WILL
Gee, not sure what to do here…Darla, I hate to ask –

DARLA
Oh! No problem. Here.

(She hands him a dollar from her purse.)

WILL
Thank you so much. I’ll catch you later. Cool?

(He hands the clerk the dollar.)

DARLA
Think nothing of it. No big deal.

Will (sitting)
So, Darla…Everyone was really impressed with your resume and what I had to say about you.

DARLA
Good to hear.

WILL
Everyone’s certain you’re the VP of operations we need to turn this Darnell Investments around.

DARLA
Well, I’m very excited about the possibility. I really enjoyed all the people I met last week. I can see myself getting along really well there.

WILL
Excellent…Excellent… Oh, that was a job offer, by the way.

DARLA
Really? Great! That’s great. Tell me more.

WILL
Well, you can start immediately. As soon as you’re able. Tomorrow?

DARLA
Will, I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, but we haven’t even discussed salary or benefits.

WILL (sucking through his teeth)
We’ll have to move some things around, but I could give you a figure sometime next week.

DARLA
You want me to start working without knowing what I’m making?

WILL
I’d like to get you started, right away. You’re bright. You’ve got some great ideas that can really take this company in new, exciting directions. You like the job, you want the job. I say, why not jump in? The water’s fine. We’ll figure things out as we go.

DARLA
Right. I see. How come we’re not meeting at your office?

WILL
My office? What’s an office? A place where I do business? I do business anywhere and everywhere. Any time, anyhow. You could say this is my office.

(Nancy the intern enters and sets a small stack of papers down next to Will.)

NANCY
Here are print outs of your e-mail from the public library, Mr. Darnell.

WILL
Oh, thank you, Nancy.

NANCY
You’re welcome, Sir. If you don’t need me, I’ll be taking my lunch break.

(She walks away)

WILL
Very good, Nancy. (She returns) I wanted both my business and personal e-mails. Don’t worry about it, now. Go grab them after your meal. We’ll dock the extra cost in time from your stipend.

NANCY
I understand, sir. Sorry about that. Well, if you don’t need me for anything else, I’ll be standing ten feet away from you, over there. Gnawing on various dried and cured meats. (She does)

WILL
Don’t know why they call ‘em cured meats. That cow ain’t getting back up. That girl could eat her weight in beef jerky. Oh, Nancy.

DARLA
Is that your administrative assistant?

WILL
No, no. Intern. Just started. A little green, but I think under my mentorship, she’ll blossom. Speaking of blossoming, how soon can I order your new business cards, Darla?

DARLA
I’m afraid I’ll have to pass, Will…

WILL
Please, don’t say no-

DARLA
I really don’t think-

WILL
We need you, Darla. We really need you. Please. This company is sinking like a rock. We got evicted last week. All my employees left.

DARLA
Darnell Investments had over 100 employees. Who’s left?

WILL
Me. Just me.

DARLA
Wow.

WILL
And Nancy.

(He waves to her; she waves back, mouth full of jerky.)

DARLA
Will, I’m sorry your company has fallen on such hard times. But I need something more stable. For my career. For my life. I’m looking for a company I can invest in for a long time.

WILL
Do you have any money?

DARLA
To invest in your company?

WILL
Uh, no. I need to pay for Nancy’s eating habit. Part of our deal.

(Darla sighs. She puts a five-dollar bill on the table.)

WILL (continuing)
Thanks, Darla. You’re a saint. I’ll catch you later. Really.

DARLA
Right.

(She leaves.)

WILL (picking up money)
Hey, Nancy! Time to raise some capital. Buy five instant lottery tickets. I feel lucky!

(Blackout)

3 comments:

Online Print blog said...

I enjoyed the script.

Can't wait to read the next one.

-JP

idjar said...

You know what's good? I'll tell you what's good. Salmon jerky.


sqegu

Chris Othic said...

Another good set up, but I think this one lacked a little energy.

I'd like to see Will more desperate. And other than a cashier and a mention of various dried and cured meats I don't get that you used your unique location very much.

Basically, I'm say, let's get a slushy machine reference. Always funny . . . and delicious.