Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Week 15, Day 101 - "Dum-Dums"

Written by Joe Janes
101 of 365

Rudy, 20s
Ryan, 40s

(Lights up on Rudy waiting for a bus. Rudy is on his cell phone. Ryan is watching him.)

RUDY (on phone)
Still waiting on the bus, Liz. As soon as it gets here, I’m heading straight home. Yeah, it’s been a long day. See you soon. Love you.

(He puts his phone away.)

Hey, man. I’m running late. Can I use your phone to call my wife?

Uh, no. Sorry. The batteries running low. I just turned it off.

(Ryan pulls out a gun.)

Then how about I take your wallet? I’ll go by me a phone.

Why you little snot. I may be older than you, but I’m bigger could beat the tar out of you.

Good thing I have a gun and you have a brain. Now, let me have your wallet.

(Rudy hands Ryan a wallet. Ryan takes it and throws it away.)

Hey, what did you do that for?

Because that was your fake “just in case I get mugged” wallet.

How did you know that?

It’s thin, cheap, came out of your jacket and you gave it up all too quickly.

Fine. Here.

(Rudy hands Ryan his real, more substantial wallet.)

That’s more like it. Can’t believe you think I’m stupid enough to fall for a decoy wallet.

You know, armed robbery is an automatic prison sentence.

It is if the gun is real.

(Ryan makes some clicking sounds with it showing it’s just a plastic toy. They realize what he just did and Ryan bolts off stage with Rudy in quick pursuit. Blackout)


idjar said...

Based on a true story! I saw a video on True TV (It's not reality, it's actuality) in which the robber of a convenience store chuckled a bit too soon on his exit that he didn't even have a gun in his pocket (he was just happy to . . . ). He was caught and had a smack-down put on him by the clerk and others who wanted to join in on the fun.

No, I do not watch that channel. My roommate does.

One missing word:
Why you little snot. I may be older than you, but I’m bigger could beat the tar out of you.

Anonymous said...


I've been off the grid for awhile. Back on and must say that I love this sketch. It is very smart and very funny. Nice work!


Paul said...

RUDY, 20s
RYAN, 40s

Why you little snot. I may be older than you...

1) Who sez "you little snot"? Boo.

2) Not older. Did you mean to flip the characters?

Joe Janes said...

This is what happens when I post a scene after a long day working on a show. Thanks for catching the gaffes. I also made the mugger younger and the muggee older.

Joe Janes said...

Oh, and thanks, MJ. Welcome back on the grid.