Saturday, July 18, 2009

Week 26, Day 181 - “Giant Leap”

“Giant Leap”
Written by Joe Janes
181 of 365

Neil Armstrong
Buzz Aldrin
Michael Collins
Walter Cronkite

(Lights come up on a dimly lit stage. Off in the corner is a stepladder. We hear radio static and see Neil Armstrong, in his spacesuit, slowly descending the ladder.)

This is a historic moment, ladies and gentlemen. Armstrong is on the moon. Neil Armstrong, a 38-year-old American, about to stand on the surface of the moon this July 20th, 1969. The whole world is witnessing this momentous occasion.

That’s one small step for man. One giant leap for mankind.

(Neil slowly walks off as Buzz Aldrin descends the stairs.)

That doesn’t really seem to be grammatically correct, probably should have been one small step for “a” man, but I think we get the gist. And now we see, Buzz Aldrin. Soon to be the second man to step foot on the lunar surface.

I'd like to take this opportunity to ask every person listening in, whoever and wherever they may be, to pause for a moment and contemplate the events of the past few hours, and to give thanks in his or her own way.

(Buzz joins Neil is slowly walking around and exploring the lunar surface.)

Both men seem to really understand the breadth and scope of this breakthrough for all of humanity. Michael Collins is the third member of the Apollo 11 crew. Let’s see what he has to say about traveling 250,000 miles through space to the moon only to remain onboard the command module Columbia.

I cannot tell you how, as an earthling hovering above the moon all by myself, this really, really, sucks donkey ass. Take a giant leap over my dick and say thanks to that.

(Neil and Buzz flip Collins the bird overhead.)

I am at a loss for words.


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