Week 37, Day 255 - "Lighthouse Hill"

“Lighthouse Hill”

Written by Joe Janes

9/30/09

255 of 365

CAST

Caleb, 50s

Edward, 20s

(Lights up on Caleb in his lighthouse keeper uniform, similar to a train conductor’s outfit. He stands at the level below the lantern of a Maine lighthouse looking out over the rail. He is a stout, proud man. He hears sea gulls and watches a flock of them fly across the shore. We hear footsteps climbing up an iron staircase behind him. We hear a metal can full of liquid drop on the stairs and clunkety-clunk their way down.)

EDWARD (offstage and retreating downstairs)

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck-

CALEB

Language!

EDWARD (from farther off)

Shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot.

(Edward has retrieved the heavy full metal fuel oil can and quickly runs back up the stairs and out onto the landing with Caleb. He is completely out of breath. Caleb takes a watch out of his pocket and checks the time. He then removes a slim ledger from his breast pocket and makes a note.)

EDWARD

Mother is expecting you for supper.

CALEB

We’ll see.

EDWARD

I can take over your watch.

(Caleb clearly does not like this idea.)

EDWARD (continuing)

It’s clear. No clouds. (Caleb points off.) Barely a cloud. Light wind. Beautiful day. Nothing could happen.

(Caleb continues looking out at the sea.)

EDWARD (Continuing)

You’d let Tobias.

CALEB

Tobias isn’t here. And, furthermore, I would not. Not anymore. Neither you nor your brother knows what a lighthouse means to a ship out at sea.

EDWARD

Sure, I do. It means, “Hey, look… a lighthouse.”

(Caleb looks disappointed.)

EDWARD (continuing)

What does it mean, Father?

CALEB

Put yourself in the shoes of that sea captain out there.

EDWARD

Where?

CALEB

Follow my arm. (He points out.) See that small glimmer on the horizon? That’s a freighter. Imagine you’ve been crossing the Atlantic for months. Nothing to see but waves and water for miles for days, for weeks. He’s at the wheel and sees us. What do you think is going through his mind, right now?

EDWARD

“Hooray”?

CALEB

“Safe.” Safe at last. Untethered at sea. No land in sight. We could be lost. We may never get home. This lighthouse is a visual life preserver. It means he’s almost home. Safe, at home. All because we’re standing here. I’m standing here. Always here. Always safe. They depend on the lighthouse. They depend on me. The lighthouse depends on me. Dependable. Safe. Like my father before me and my father’s father.

(Edward stands at the rail, emulating his father’s proud stance.)

EDWARD

Tobias will feel the same way when he comes home.

CALEB

I told him not to bother ever coming home.

EDWARD

No, you didn’t. You didn’t speak to him for several days before he left.

CALEB

He knows. He knows.

EDWARD

He’ll come home. Eventually. And he’ll expect to see you standing here. And it will make him feel safe.

(Caleb is silent.)

EDWARD (continuing)

He spoke to me just before he left. He told me to take care of you. Bring you fuel for the lantern. Bring you plates of food. Make sure you rested. “Take care of the lighthouse keeper, he said.” Didn’t even call you dad. Take care of the lighthouse keeper.

(Caleb is still silent.)

EDWARD (continuing)

Soldiers come home on ships, too, don’t they?

CALEB

I suppose.

EDWARD

Mother made you supper. Fried chicken. Scalloped potatoes. Green beans. All your favorites.

CALEB

You could have brought me a plate.

EDWARD

Mother was hoping you’d sit at the table with her.

(Caleb looks up at the sky.)

EDWARD (continuing)

I can refill the lantern.

(Caleb looks at him with disbelief.)

EDWARD (continuing)

No spills. No fires. Other than the lantern. I’ll even trim the wick. And I’ll stand here. After I do all the other stuff. I’ll stand here just like you and let the ships know they are safe.

(Caleb considers this.)

EDWARD (continuing)

And I will only use the foghorn if there is fog. It is not a plaything.

(Caleb sees potential in his son. He hands Edward his pocket watch. Edward takes it, smiling. Caleb also hands Edward his ledger and pen. Edward graciously accepts it. Caleb puts his hand on Edward’s shoulder.)

CALEB

You’ll make a fine lighthouse keeper, Son.

(Edward is moved and speechless. He hugs his dad. It’s a little too much for Caleb. He pries himself away, gives Edward a nod and exits down the stairs. Edward looks out over the sea. He looks happy and proud. He puts his hands on the railing and accidentally drops the pocket watch, ledger and pen.)

EDWARD

Fuck.

(Blackout.)

Week 37, Day 254 - "The Last Unicorn"

“The Last Unicorn”

Written by Joe Janes

9/29/09

254 of 365

CAST

Caitlin, 6

Barbara, 30s

Beau, 30s

Unicorn

(Lights up on the Beagle family singing happy birthday to six-year-old Caitlin Beagle. Caitlin makes a wish and blows out the candles on her cake. Everyone cheers. Beau hands her a present.)

BEAU

I bet I know what my little princess wished for.

CAITLIN

Is it in there?

BEAU

Better open it and find out.

(She opens it and pulls out a small stuffed unicorn. She looks disappointed.)

BARBARA

What’s the matter, Caitlin? I thought you wanted a unicorn.

CAITLIN

I wanted a real unicorn.

BARBARA

Honey, unicorns aren’t real.

CAITLIN

Daddy said they were.

BARABRA

Beau.

BEAU

I told her I’d look into it. And I did, princess. Daddy looked into getting you a real unicorn.

BARBARA (through her teeth)

After all the bullshit we went through with the Tooth Fairy, how could you do this? (To Caitlin) Honey, you remember the conversation we had about the tooth fairy?

CAITLIN

Yes, Mommy.

BARBARA

And about Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny and grandpa’s good friend Jack Daniels.

CAITLIN

None of them are real, but Daddy said he’d get me a unicorn. A for real one.

BARBARA

Daddy sometimes says things he doesn’t mean because he loves you so much.

BEAU

Barbara…I found one. I did. A guy at work knew a guy who knew a guy who put a used one up on Craig’s List.

CAITLIN

You got me one, Daddy?

BEAU

Yes, sweetheart. But, I’m going to take it back. It’s real sick or something.

BARBARA

Beau, we need to tell her the truth. Like we said we would do.

BEAU

It’s the truth, Barbara. I swear. This thing’s real, but, man, there’s something wrong.

CAITLIN

I want to see my unicorn.

BEAU

I’ll go get it. It’s in the garage. But, Caitlin, sweetie, really, don’t get attached. We’re going to take it back.

(He exits.)

BARBARA

I don’t know what daddy’s pulling here, Caitlin.

CAITLIN

He said he would get me a unicorn and he did. I love my daddy. Don’t you love Daddy, Mommy?

BARBARA

Sometimes. (She catches herself) And by that I mean all the time, yeah!

(Beau re-enters holding a reign.)

BEAU

Okay, Caitlin. Now, don’t get too close. Like I said, there’s something wrong with it. It’s sick or something.

(Beau walks the unicorn in. It is the most un-unicorn looking man in a white wig, dirty white leotard and tights with a horn and tail. It is a unicorn, but, man, it is not pretty.)

CAITLIN

Yeah!

BARBARA

What the hell?

BEAU

Don’t get too close, Caitlin.

(The unicorn looks around. It looks like a strung out drug addict.)

CAITLIN

I’m going to give it a great big hug!

(Caitlin runs up to him and hugs him. The unicorn coughs.)

BEAU

Okay, okay, but be careful. Don’t squeeze too hard. Stuff comes out of it.

BARBARA

Like what? Oh, dear God. (While Caitlin is enjoying her hug, Barbara and Beau catch wind of some noxious unicorn gas.)

BEAU

You see. He’s sick. It’s a bad, smelly, goopy unicorn.

BARBARA

You should take him to the vet’s.

BEAU

I did. He told me there’s nothing he can do. It’s one old, sick dying unicorn. But it’s the only one I could find. The guy I bought it from said he was taking good care of it. Feeding it oats and hay.

CAITLIN

That’s silly. Unicorns don’t eat oats and hay.

BEAU

What do unicorns eat, Caitlin?

CAITLIN

Marshmallows and rainbows.

(The unicorn perks up when he hears this.)

CAITLIN

See. He likes it. I’m going to call him Abraham Lincoln.

BEAU

I’ll go get some marshmallows.

(He exits. Caitlin continues to hug the sickly unicorn who spits up on the carpet.)

BARBARA

Honey, make sure you wash your hands. (The unicorn starts licking Caitlin’s head.) And your skull.

(Beau rushes back in and puts a bag of marshmallows up to the unicorn who starts to enthusiastically eat them like oats from a feedbag.)

CAITLIN

You see, you see. He’s all better. Can we keep him? Can we keep him?

BARBARA

I guess. But he’ll have to stay in the garage. (To Beau) She does seem happy.

BEAU

Yeah. For now. The vet told me something else. He has unicorn aids.

CAITLIN (hugging the unicorn)

I love you, Abraham Lincoln!

BARBARA

We’ll put him down tomorrow.

BEAU

And tell Caitlin he went to stay on a big farm?

(They do a small fist bump while watching Caitlin enjoys her unicorn. The unicorn coughs up a little blood. Lights fade.)

Week 37, Day 253 - "Elaborate"

“Elaborate”

Written by Joe Janes

9/28/09

253 of 365

CAST

Andrew, 50s

Sarah, 40s

Charlie, 40s

Tracey, 20s

Tina, 20s

Wendell, 60s

(Lights up on a conference room. Andrew, Sarah, and Charlie all look anxious. Charlie looks at his watch and then at the others. Tina enters and stands at attention.)

TINA

Chief Executive Officer, Wendell Lonsdale.

(Tracey walks in spreading rose petals on the floor. She stands on the other side of the room. Wendell enters. He wears a typical business suit, except that his sports coat is over his shoulders, like an overcoat or robe. He looks at Andrew, Sarah and Charlie and clears his throat. They quickly stand. Wendell walks over to the table. Sarah holds out his chair for him. He sits. On his cue, the other three sit back down.)

ANDREW

Wendell, we have some important-

(Wendell holds up his hand to stop him.)

WENDELL

I am parched.

(He snaps his fingers. Tracey and Tina move into action as Wendell leans back and opens his mouth. Tina takes a small bottle of Perrier and pours a small amount into Wendell’s mouth. Tracey squeezes a small piece of lime over it. Tina then wipes Wendell’s mouth. Wendell snaps his fingers again and Tina and Tracey go back to their spots. Wendell waves his hand as if to tell Andrew to go.)

ANDREW

We’re running dangerously in the red. We need to make severe cuts or our company will be belly up by the end of the year.

WENDELL

I see. We have to respond appropriately to the times. We need to tighten our belts. Make sacrifices. Let’s lay off 30,000 workers. Cut executive salaries by 20%. And no more free candy on the receptionist’s desk.

SARAH

That’s all good, sir. But it still may not be enough.

CHARLIE

Sir, with all due respect. You’re going on a trip next week to South America. Thirty days with your two assistants.

WENDELL

That’s a business trip. We’re sampling various coffees around that continent to find the best one for our employee break rooms. It’s about quality and finding the best for our employees. It’s an investment in people.

CHARLIE

And it’s going to cost the company $100,000. Hard to justify when we’re making all these cuts. That could be the salary of two or three workers.

WENDELL

What’s your salary?

CHARLIE

$125,000.

WENDELL

You’re fired. There just saved one worker’s job and I still get to go on my coffee expedition. (He stretches) Oh, I’m exhausted. Well, time for my four o’clock champagne enema. If you need me to make more tough cost-cutting decisions, I’ll be in my helicopter RV.

(He exits followed quickly by Tina and Tracey. Charlie starts crying. Sarah hands him a tissue, but Andrew stops her.)

ANDREW

Those cost money.

(She stuffs it back in the tissue box. Lights fade.)

Week 36, Day 252- "Three Bags Full"

“Three Bags Full”

Written by Joe Janes

9/27/09

252 of 365

CAST:

Matt, 50s

Brian, 40s

Stephen, 30s

Meme, 20s

Sharla, 20s

Bartender

(Lights up on Meme sitting at a small table sipping a drink. Sitting next to her is her friend, a heavyset woman named Sharla. Matt, Brian, And David enter. They all wear untucked striped dress shirts. They all see Meme and move towards her as one.)

MATT

Hey, there, little Filly.

BRIAN

What are you doing later?

STEPHEN

Let’s blow this popsicle stand.

(She tries to ignore them.)

MATT

I drive a big car.

BRIAN

I make lots of moo-la.

STEPHEN

Say –

MATT/BRIAN/STEPHEN

That’s a hot outfit.

MATT

The only thing that would make it look better would be not seeing it at all.

BRIAN

I’m really quite sensitive,

STEPHEN

My woman doesn’t understand me.

MATT/BRIAN/STEPHEN

I was bit by a dog when I was four.

MATT

You really turn me on.

BRIAN

Say-

STEPHEN

That perfume you’re wearing-

MATT/BRIAN/STEPHEN

I might just lose control.

MATT

What’s this in my Coke?

BRIAN

Relax-

STEPHEN

Baby-

MATT/BRIAN/STEPHEN

I’m not going to bite. Yet.

MATT

Let’s go to my place.

BRIAN

My parents are out of town.

STEPHEN

I think I might be gay.

MATT/BRIAN/STEPHEN

Will you help me?

MATT

You’d like me if you got to know me better.

BRIAN

Everyday, I’m either giving blood-

STEPHEN

Recycling-

MATT/BRIAN/STEPHEN

Humping the homeless.

MATT

Saving the rainforests.

BRIAN

The ozone.

STEPHEN

The whales.

MATT/BRIAN/STEPHEN

Well, not all the whales.

(They simultaneously all turn and look at Sharla.)

MATT/BRIAN/STEPHEN (continuing)

I like Oprah, Dr. Phil, Michael Booooo-blay. I like running marathons, biking the drive, and cleaning my oven.

MATT

Deep down-

BRIAN

Underneath-

STEPHEN

Buried deep beneath several layers of fat-

MATT/BRIAN/STEPHEN

I’m really very intuitive to what a woman needs. (They all three stick out their tongues and lap at a giant, imaginary vagina.) I really just want to get to know you better.

MEME (standing)

You’re pathetic. If you ever want to get anywhere with me physically, you first have to get somewhere with me mentally. You have to sincerely be interested in who I am... unless, of course, I’m drunk.

(She exits.)

MATT/BRIAN/STEPHEN

Can we buy you a drink?

(She does not respond.)

BARTENDER (offstage)

Last call!

(They turn their attention to Sharla.)

MATT

Hey, there, little Filly.

BRIAN

What are you doing later?

STEPHEN

Let’s blow this popsicle stand.

(Blackout.)

Week 36, Day 251 - "The Awakening"

“The Awakening”

Written by Joe Janes

9/26/09

251 of 365

CAST

Henry, 50s

Father Theodore, 50s

(Lights up on Henry’s bedroom early in the morning. He is deep asleep. His bell alarm clock goes off. He hits the button and it goes off. He barely wakes up to do that. He is quickly back to slumbering. Another electric alarm clock goes off across the room. He growls. He gets up and crosses the room to turn it off. He stands for a moment in the dark. He takes a deep breath. He coughs a bit. He rubs his face. He stretches. It feels good. He walks back to the bed and crawls back in and goes to sleep. Another buzzing alarm clock outside the room goes off. He climbs out of bed and stumbles out the door to offstage. We hear a cat get stepped on; he says “Fuck!” and a lamp gets knocked over. He turns the alarm clock off. He comes back into the bedroom and turns the light on. He stretches some more as he walks to the center of the room. He gets down on the floor on his back and starts to do sit-ups. He starts off quickly and spends more and more time when he is on his back. Until finally, he simply lies on his back. After a pause, he farts. A moment later, we hear soft snoring. A clock radio goes off near his bed. It’s playing whatever horrible schlocky dance Top Ten hit of the moment, Miley Cyrus or something. He crawls over and shuts it off. While on his knees, he collapses the upper part of his body onto his bed. Father Theodore stands in the doorway holding a broken lamp. He lightly clears his throat. Henry straightens up and pretends to be praying. Father Theodore shakes his head and walks off. Henry peeks to see if Father Theodore is still there. Relieved to find him gone, he sits on the edge of his bed. He looks distraught. He wonders if he’s really cut out for the monastery. He looks up, closes his eyes and prays for real. We hear the glorious sound of angels. Henry looks perturbed. He reaches over to the foot of the bed and turns off another alarm clock. Blackout.)

Week 36, Day 250 - "Detained"

“Detained”

Written by Joe Janes

9/25/09

250 of 365

CAST

John

Monty

Caroline

Principal Haversham

(Lights up on Caroline sitting alone in a classroom. There are other chairs around her, positioned uniformly. She looks agitated. John walks in. They exchange looks.)

CAROLINE

You, too?

JOHN

Yep. Good seeing you in the hallway this morning.

CAROLINE

You made me late.

JOHN

You were already late.

CAROLINE

You made me later.

(He sits. Monty enters and sits directly without looking at them.)

CAROLINE

You’re never in here.

MONTY

First time.

JOHN

My how the mighty has fallen.

MONTY

My mother’s going to kill me. It’s Taco Night.

CAROLINE

That’s sweet. Your mother makes you tacos.

MONTY

No. I take her out and I buy her tacos. She loves tacos. Taco Bell tacos. Won’t even think of trying any other kind. I hate her so.

JOHN

What are you in for, Caroline?

CAROLINE

What do you think? Tardy.

JOHN

Weren’t you in here last week for that?

CAROLINE

Yes.

JOHN

So, then you’re re-tardy. (He laughs and tries to get a high five from Monty who just stares at him.) I’m sorry, I meant re-mentally challenged. What horrible thing did you do, Monty? Color-coordinate the sugar packets in the cafeteria?

MONTY

That wasn’t a crime.

JOHN

Then what?

MONTY

Gum. Under my desk.

JOHN

Oh, big whoop.

MONTY

What did you do, John? Kill someone?

JOHN

Smoking in the little boys room. Haversham had a fit. Threatened to call the police.

CAROLINE

No way.

JOHN

Way. Way way. I had to beg to get detention. I’m not proud.

(Mr. Haverhsam, an imposing humorless figure stands in the doorway and clears his throat. Everyone stops talking and looks down. Haversham moves to a desk in front of them and sits down. He stares at them all quietly for as long as painfully possible. They steal looks at him and look back down at the floor.)

HAVERHSAM

I am disgusted. We spend the better part of the day trying to improve the minds and therefore the futures of the students here. This is a private school. Parents pay good money to send their children to us. And here we have three teachers unable to behave themselves. Miss Cass, you are so frequently late that your students run a pool to see how many minutes past the hour you will walk in the door. Mr. Winston won this morning.

CAROLINE (glaring at John)

That’s why you stopped me in the hall.

(John shrugs)

HAVERSHAM

Mr. Winston seems to think our institution is a pool hall and that laws about smoking don’t apply to him. And as filthy a habit as smoking is, there’s one I find even more disturbing. Gum chewing, Mr. Dufhoppel. Particularly when said gum is dispensed of under the edges of furniture. When I sat down at your desk to borrow a ruler, a Bubble Yum stalactite nearly punctured my thigh. I’m lucky I don’t need stitches. (He stares at them some more, this time more intently.) This isn’t public school so no more acting like it is. No more detentions for the three of you. One more infraction from any of you and you all three are fired.

MONTY

All three?

CAROLINE

That’s not fair. He made me late.

JOHN

Later.

HAVERSHAM

You need to stop your own selfish behavior and make sure the other two don’t mess up. No more gum, no more cigarettes, no more lateness. (He walks to the door.) Figure out whatever you need to figure out to make this work, or, if you’re a fool, take a chance that the others just won’t screw things up for you.

(He laughs and exits. The three all look at each other worried.)

CAROLINE

What are we going to do?

(John takes out a cigarette and lights up.)

JOHN

Fuck it. I hate my job.

(Monty takes out gum and pops it in his mouth.)

MONTY

My mother takes my paycheck anyway. She drove me to this.

(Caroline picks up her bag and heads to the door.)

JOHN

Too late, Caroline, you’re already on time, for once.

(John and Monty laugh. Caroline flips them off as she exits. John and Monty high five. John coughs on his smoke, Monty chokes on his gum. Blackout.)

Week 36, Day 249 - "Typewriter Repair"

“Typewriter Repair”

Written by Joe Janes

9/24/09

249 of 365

CAST

Oswald, 60s

Ike, 30s

George, 40s

(Lights up on Oswald looking down through reading glasses working on the keys of an old typewriter. We hear a store bell ding as George walks in through the door. He is wearing an iPod. Oswald gives him a look. George nods and looks around the small store a bit.)

OSWALD

That’s a 1922 Underwood.

GEORGE (taking out ear buds)

It’s beautiful.

OSWALD

It’s a 1922 Underwood.

GEORGE

I feel like there should be an old candlestick phone right next to it. “Got a hot one for you, Mack - Governor and Mistress Caught in Love Nest. Stop the presses.” (He nods to himself) You restore these?

OSWALD

Restore and repair. Need a typewriter repaired?

GEORGE

Wish I did. Been by this place a million times. Looked in your window and decided, “What the hell?” I had an electric portable one in college. A Royal. Quite the popular guy on my dorm room floor. Everyone wanted to borrow it. A guy named Ted broke it.

OSWALD (pointing)

Did it look like that one?

GEORGE

Yep. Sure as hell did. Wow. Mine was dark blue, but this. Takes me back. So, this is what you do.

OSWALD

This is what I’ve always done.

GEORGE

All by yourself?

OSWALD

My son helps.

GEORGE

This is so great. You do this one thing, that you love, right?

OSWALD

That’s why I do it.

GEORGE

I don’t do anything.

OSWALD

Everybody does something.

GEORGE

Nothing like this. Not everybody gets to do something like this.

OSWALD

Not like I’m turning people away at the door.

GEORGE

But you make a living, right? You support yourself.

OSWALD

I sleep in the back.

GEORGE

In the back of the place where you get to do the thing you really love to do.

OSWALD

Guess so.

(Ike enters carrying take out. He is dressed almost identically to Oswald and wears similar glasses.)

IKE

I got us some gyros.

OSWALD

Jesus, Ike. Why not just take an eggbeater to my guts? Or just throw it in the toilet, because that’s where it will be in twenty minutes.

IKE

Hey. Whoever gets lunch gets to decide lunch. And, besides it’s cheap and next door.

OSWALD

Cheap and next door. Like your mother. (They laugh and then turn serious) God rest her soul.

IKE

God rest her soul.

GEORGE

You two are father and son?

IKE

Yep.

GEORGE

Man, this place just gets cooler and cooler. You do what you love and you’re passing your legacy on to your son.

(Ike and Oswald look at one another like George is crazy.)

GEORGE (continuing)

Typewriters. These are all like sculptures, works of art. I bet when they first came out, printers were crapping their pants.

OSWALD

How’s that?

GEORGE

You know, new technology. People could do what they do, but on their own.

(Ike shrugs.)

GEORGE (continuing)

Like computers today and how they’re killing newspapers. I can’t remember the last time I bought a newspaper. Hey, how much is this old Royal.

IKE

Seventy-five dollars.

GEORGE

Really? That’s what I paid for it in college.

OSWALD

Too much?

GEORGE

I thought it would be more, being an antique and all.

OSWALD

Well, it’s electric.

IKE

Not as much call for those.

OSWALD

And it did drop in value over the years. Now, since I restored it, the price crept back up to what it used to be worth.

IKE

Goes in cycles. Like life.

OSWALD

Like a looping typewriter ribbon.

GEORGE

Wow. You just blew my mind. I’ll get this. I’ll get this.

(Oswald, who has continued working on the typewriter in front of him, directs Ike to go get it. Ike puts down his gyro and brings the typewriter back to the counter. They conduct their transaction as they talk.)

GEORGE (continuing)

Why typewriters?

OSWALD

I love typewriters.

GEORGE

I know. I get that. But why? How did you know, “Hey… typewriters.”

OSWALD

Some people do cars. Some people do model trains. Electronics. For me, it’s the smell of the oil, the clack of the keys, the weight, the elegance of the lines. The pure human-driven mechanics of it. On these old ones. There’s no battery. The only battery is the brain. “War and Peace” was written on a typewriter. Lots of great novels were. Important documents, too. Peace treaties. There was no cutting or pasting or deleting. There was trying to get it right, thinking it through, thinking ahead and making big, sloppy messes.

IKE

What’s not to love?

(George picks up his typewriter and heads to the door.)

GEORGE

I’ll be back. And I’ll tell my friends.

(He nods and exits.)

OSWALD (looking at typewriter)

Is he gone?

IKE

He’s looking in the front window.

(Ike waves hesitantly. Oswald takes his gyro and holds it up.)

OSWALD

Eat this or throw it in the toilet. Ike shrugs and takes it. Lights fade as Oswald sneaks a look up at the window and does a small wave.)