Written by Joe Janes
9/1/09
226 of 365
CAST
Boris, 30s
Sophia, 30s
Barbra, 12
Griffin, 60s
Geoff, 20s
Keely, 20s
(Lights up on Boris, a man in his 30s wearing shorts, sandals and a crumpled polo shirt. He is simply standing and staring, intently, on a very fixed point in the direction of the audience.)
SOPHIA (off)
Boris!
(Sophia enters. She is also in her 30s. She is Boris’s wife and is similarly dressed as he. She drags along Barbra, 12, who has a balloon preferably shaped like a zoo animal’s head.)
SOPHIA (continuing)
There you are. Boris, I think we’re ready to go.
BARBARA
Let’s go, Daddy.
(Pause)
SOPHIA
Boris? Did you hear me?
BORIS (still staring)
I heard you, Sophia.
SOPHIA
Well?
BORIS
I can’t leave just now.
BARBRA
Daddy, we already saw the giraffes.
BORIS
I know, Barbra.
BARBRA
Then why are you still here?
BORIS
Because that one keeps staring at me.
SOPHIA
Are you dehydrated? I told you to hydrate at lunch.
BORIS (never breaking his stare)
I’m hydrated. I was just standing here watching him eat some leaves off the top of that tree. Then he stopped, as if he could feel me watching him, and then he just turned his head and stared back.
SOPHIA
Oh, my God. He is staring at you.
BORIS
I know.
SOPHIA
How long as this been going on?
(Griffin, an old retired man, walks up to look at the giraffes. He begins to notice that something is off.)
BORIS
I don’t know. Twenty minutes? I haven’t looked at my watch. I just keep looking back.
BARBRA
Why?
BORIS
Why? I don’t know why? Ask him. He started it.
BARBRA
Hey, giraffe! Why are you staring at my daddy?
SOPHIA
Honey, shush. You’ll get us in trouble.
GRIFFIN
I’ll be damned. That giraffe is staring at you.
BORIS
I know.
GRIFFIN
I come here every day. I’ve never seen anything like that.
BORIS
I think he’s challenging me.
SOPHIA
He’s not challenging you, Boris. He’s just a dumb animal.
BORIS
That’s just it. Maybe he doesn’t think he is. Maybe he thinks he’s better than me.
GRIFFIN
Better than a human? Stare that bastard down, young man.
BORIS
I intend to do just that, Sir.
GRIFFIN
Call me Griffin. Retired Major, US Army. I fought in the Great War.
BORIS
World War II?
GRIFFIN
Grenada. October, 1983.
SOPHIA
Thank you for defending our freedom.
GRIFFIN
My pleasure, ma’am. (To Boris) I’ve got you covered, in case that giraffe gets out of hand. (He pats his jacket breast pocket and nods.)
BORIS
Thanks, Griffin.
GRIFFIN
It’s an honor.
(Pause – everyone is staring at the giraffe, now.)
SOPHIA
How long do you expect this to go on, Boris?
BORIS
As long as it takes. I’m not backing down.
(Pause as they all continue to stare. Barbra starts to get antsy.)
BARBRA
Mom, I have to pee.
SOPHIA
Use your big girl bladder.
BARBRA
I am and my big girl bladder is full.
SOPHIA
Okay. Fine. Let’s find a bathroom.
(Sophia rushes off with Barbra. Griffin and Boris still stare out.)
GRIFFIN
Damn.
BORIS
What?
GRIFFIN
Now, my big girl bladder is full. (He starts to exit.) You gonna be all right?
BORIS
I’m a rock.
GRIFFIN
If I don’t make it back, I want you to know, I’m proud of you, Son.
(He salutes Boris and exits. Boris continues standing. Lights fade. Lights come back up on another part of the stage on Geoff. He stands looking out, staring. Keely enters.)
KEELY
You’re still here, Geoff?
GEOFF
That asshole human won’t stop staring at me. Who does he think he is?
KEELY
Asshole human. Leaf? (Hands Geoff a leaf.)
GEOFF
Thanks. (Geoff takes the leaf and chews on it while he continues to stare.) Asshole human.
(Lights fade.)
6 comments:
Interesting. That's code for I don't really get this, but I think there's a kernel in it somewhere... I like the idea of a staring contest between a man, and a giraffe. Is there any blinking going on?
Griffin the Vet says that he comes to the zoo every day. Is he a docent? Could he be? The Lincoln Park Zoo is terminating docents at the end of October, and these people that come there every day to help zoo visitors will soon be extinct like some of the animals. See link to Trib story. What if this giraffe were staring Boris down on Griffin's last day as a docent, or what if the animals revolted over the firing of the docents?
http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/columnists/chi-schmich_30_bdaug30,0,4390070.column
I didn't know about the docents. Thanks for the info and for increasing my vocabulary. I like the idea of them just finding themselves in a staring contest and neither willing to back down, however more could be explored to escalate the situation. Thanks.
I didn't mean to totally veer into a different direction, it's just that I had just been reading about the docents, and getting all riled up, and that Griffin character reminded me of the docent featured in Schmich's column.
The staring contest premise is a good one, but there could me more at stake, or escalation like you indicated. In any case, I do admire you for committing to this 365 project, and putting your work out there each day. In various ways, and on various sites, I sort of do the same with my own writing, and if I like something I try to take it further, and revise it, and if I don't I just let it die, and chalk it up to the intellectual equivalent of exercise. Speaking of which, off to do that...
sorry, could "be* more at stake, not *me*
I like this one, and agree with previous comments about stakes and escalating, but I also like that it's really over a very trivial matter.
Something about the "big girl bladder" line sticks out to me, like I don't know any Mom that would say that to her kid. Of course, that means you have probably heard this line in real life.
I think if it were me, I might explore the mother daughter thing by having the girl get scared, like kids do when adults are acting strange. That might be the way to get them out of there, and Sophia might also get creeped out eventually, and want to leave. This might escalate it a little, and set up the audience thinking there is something more going on (like a Stephen King story).
I think I'd like to see a more definitive ending to the scene with Boris and Griffin--or just Boris alone staring, and then the final tag with the two giraffes would kill if you put it later in the show as a call black (yeah, I just coined my own term).
The ending could totally be used as a callback. For sure.
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