Monday, September 21, 2009

Week 36, Day 246 - "Runaway"

“Runaway”

Written by Joe Janes

9/21/09

246 of 365

CAST

Billy

Ellen

(Lights up on Billy sitting on a stoop. He wears a windbreaker and he looks tired. He holds a stick with a bandanna tied in the end like a pouch. It is filled with a few things. A porch light comes on behind him.)

ELLEN

Billy?... Billy, is that you?

BILLY

Yeah. It’s me, Aunt Ellen.

ELLEN

Somebody looks like he’s a little down in the dumpsters.

BILLY

I guess.

(She sits down next to him.)

ELLEN

Run away from home, did ya’?

BILLY

I guess.

ELLEN

What’s the matter, Billy? What mean thing did my sister do, now?

BILLY

She never lets me watch what I want to watch on television.

ELLEN

That’s pretty serious.

BILLY

She’s always bossing me around, telling me what to do.

ELLEN

Yeah. That can be rough.

BILLY

She makes me clean up stuff that I didn’t even make messy, like the yard.

ELLEN

Well, sometimes everybody needs to pitch in. It is just the two of you.

BILLY

But sometimes when I come home, I’m just tired. I don’t want to do any of that stuff. I just want to eat, watch TV or play video games. Why can’t I do that?

ELLEN

We all wish we could play all the time. But, sometimes, you need to work a little harder. She means well. She loves you and cares about you.

BILLY

No she doesn’t.

ELLEN (putting her hand on his arm)

Yes, she does. You’re her little man. She just wants your help.

BILLY

You wouldn’t make me do any of that stuff if I lived here, would ya’?

ELLEN

Well, if you lived here, I might. Sure you’re ready to move into a new place? Doesn’t look like you brought a lot.

BILLY

I brought what I need. (He opens up the bandana.) I have the crust from a baloney sandwich – I ate the inside part, a clean pair of underwear, my Axe Body Spray, a pack of cigarettes and my Cialis.

ELLEN

I don’t think that will last you a very long time. Tell you what. (Standing up) Why don’t you come inside? I just made some chocolate chip cookies. You can have as many as you like. And when you’ve had as many as your little belly can hold and you’re starting to feel all sleepy, we’ll call your wife and have her come get you. Okay?

BILLY (stands up)

Okay. I’ll probably just drive back. Thank you, Aunt Ellen.

ELLEN

You’re welcome. Now, get your buns in there. (She smacks him on the behind as he enters the house.) Boys.

(Blackout)

4 comments:

GW said...

Fun. But is his aunt also his sister-in-law? Wouldn't that mean he's married to his mom; or another of his aunts? Or does he just call her Aunt Ellen even though she's not an aunt? Or am I so slow that I was likely birthed by an equally incestuous family dynamic?

Joe Janes said...

Ouch, my brain hurts, now. You're right, that would make her his sister in law. I'll go back to the family tree and break off that limb.

Chris Othic said...

Yeah, something strange going on here.

And I hate to say it but I saw the ending coming a miiiillllllle away. I think the giveaway is when Ellen says "What mean thing did my sister do, now?" It sounds funny and at that point I think most audience members would figure out the real relationship.

Anonymous said...

@Chris,
I didn't think it was a giveaway that she referred to her as "my sister". I was actually a bit surprised by the ending. Although calling a sister-in-law "aunt" is a bit strange.