Thursday, January 22, 2009

Week One, Day Four - "Czernik on the Bus"

CZERNIK ON THE BUS”
Written by Joe Janes
(Based on a suggestion from Tim Musho)
4 of 365

CAST:
CZERNIK
MAX, THE BUS DRIVER
LITTLE GIRL
LITTLE GIRL’S MOTHER
OLD LADY
PASSENGER #1
PASSENGER #2
AS MANY OTHER PEOPLE AS POSSIBLE

(Lights up on Czernik getting on the bus. He is an older, timid looking man bundled up in a parka.)

CZERNIK
Hi, Max.

MAX
Afternoon, Czernik, my man.

(Czernik moves through the crowded bus. He sees an Old Lady who has placed her bag on a seat. He looks at her and gestures, with a slightly snobby flair, for her to move her bag. She sighs and puts the bag on her lap. He wedges himself in next to her. He puts on his iPod and presses play. We hear an electronic dance version of “Tubular Bells,” the theme from the film “The Exorcist.” This is all that we hear. In the back of the bus there is a commotion that he does not see. During the scene, he is oblivious and simply sits and stares out towards the audience. Max, without ever stopping the bus, grabs the old lady and makes her take over driving while he moves to the back. He moves people away revealing a small girl being held by the arms by Passenger #1 and Passenger #2 and she is psychotically flipping out. She is pale and has blood red scars on her face and arms. Her mother is off to the side crying hysterically. The girl spits pea soup at the bus driver. As passengers restrain the girl, the bus driver goes back to his seat and removes a briefcase from under it. He goes back to the girl, opens the case on the floor and removes a Bible, a collar and a small vial of holy water. He puts on the collar and begins exorcising the demon from the little girl. Lights flash and the bus rocks back and forth. We cannot hear because of the music, but he is reading from the book, splashing the girl with water and yelling things like “The Power of Christ compels you!” over and over. The bus fills with fog and the little girl appears to levitate. The bus driver grabs her by the throat and begins to strangle and punch her. At one point, he clearly becomes possessed by the demon and throws himself out the window. The fog dissipates; the little girl is now fine and being held by her mother. Czernik has still not noticed anything. He sees his stop and pulls the signal cord. He turns off his iPod and prepares to exit the bus.)

CZERNIK (not looking at driver)
Have a nice day, Max.

OLD LADY
Adios, asshole.

(Czernik looks at her quizzically and exits. Lights fade.)

8 comments:

Old Ned said...

lol. I wonder what else Czernik has on his iPod.

Joe Janes said...

I've got a feeling we'll find out this year!

Jill said...

Love it! Keep up the good work.

PS I almost spit coffee on my monitor when I figured out who "Enya's Assassin" is. Ha!

Enya's Assassin said...

Joe blew my cover! No more fighting crime at night with the power of Enya's music.

Joe Janes said...

All a part of my and Obama's new transparency policy, Chris.

- Joe

P.S. Bruce Wayne is Batman. Clark Kent is Superman, Peter Parker is Spiderman.

Glen said...

Czernik is such an honest character, he could have been a neighbor of Kitty Genovese.

Joe Janes said...

Except that he's so unaware. I could see him having a similar fate to Kitty Genovese.

melissa martens said...

hahahahaha...this could make a funny short film.